Practical Information
I want to temporarily move somewhere else, what should I do?
You should call the Advice and Intake Bureau of Stichting Wende. You will then be assisted by an expert adviser who knows about domestic violence and relationships. You can discuss your situation with the adviser and try and find the best solution together. You can usually move to a secret address within 24 hours. However, you will have to arrange your own transport.
Call to make an appointment: 070 392 57 74. You can call this number on Monday to Friday between 09.00 and 17:00 hours. In urgent cases, you can also call this number outside of these times and in the weekend. You can also email us.
Who is eligible for refuge accommodation?
Stichting Wende offers various types of temporary accommodation. For women, men, and pregnant girls and young mothers.
Women's refuge
For women (and their children) who want to escape a violent situation. Many women want the violence to stop, but not the relationship. Some don't want to go back at all, but want to live somewhere else independently. While others have not yet made up their mind, but need time to recover so they can make a decision about their future.
Men's refuge
For men aged 18 and over who no longer feel safe where they live. For example, men:
who have been physically or psychologically abused by their partner;
who have been the victim of honour crimes by family members;
who have a homosexual relationship.
Accommodation for pregnant girls and young mothers
For young women with children who find it difficult to manage their own home, who have debts, or who have problems bringing up their children. Sometimes they are the victims of threats or physical abuse. In the temporary accommodation they can get their life back on track.
Can my children go with me to a refuge?
Children are welcome. But special arrangements have to be made for boys aged 15 and over.
Can my pets go with me to a refuge?
Unfortunately, you cannot take your pets with you.
Because you might be in a refuge for some time, it is important that you take the following items with you:
passport or residence permit, citizen service number, money, bank account details, health insurance details, clothes, toiletries, and medicines.
Towels, sheets, and cooking utensils are provided in the refuge.
You can also take other items with you that have an emotional value, such as photographs and books or cuddly toys for the children.
Should I tell anyone that I am leaving?
Tell as few people as possible that you are leaving. You can always call friends, acquaintances, or family from your new home. But you must not tell anyone where you are living.
If your children are going with you, it is a good idea to prepare them for the new situation. Children usually soon feel at home in our homes and like living there.
What will my new accommodation look like?
You will have your own room with a washbasin. You will live and sleep (together with your children) in a single room. In addition, there are rooms in the house you will share with the other residents, such as the kitchen, shower, and toilet.
Who will I be living with in a refuge?
You will be living together in a house with people who are in the same situation.
Only women live in a women's refuge, and in a men's refuge only men. There are also special homes for pregnant girls and young women. Approximately ten women or men and their children live in each home.
Do I have to do domestic chores in a refuge?
You will be responsible for the upkeep of the home. You will have to clean your own room, do your shopping, cook your own meals, and care for your children.
You will also be expected to help keep the house clean.
Everybody is given a household task.
Can my children go to school as normal?
Your children will go to school every day as normal. They can usually be placed immediately in a local school.
Do I have to pay rent?
You will have to pay an amount towards your rent every month. You will have to pay this from your own wages or benefits. You can apply for benefits from the refuge. Any money you have left over you can use for food, clothes, and so on.
Young women without an income will be given pocket money and money for clothing and food.
What happens to my wages or benefits?
You will keep your own income as normal. However, you will have to pay an amount towards your rent every month. Any money you have left over you can use for food, clothes, and so on.
Can people visit me in a refuge?
For your own safety and the safety of other residents, it is important that the address of the refuge remains secret. This means nobody is allowed to visit you. You can of course always meet people away from the refuge to go shopping or for leisure activities.
If I live in a refuge, can I continue with my sporting activities and go out as normal?
You can meet people away from the refuge to go shopping or for leisure activities as normal. You can also continue working. But you must not tell anyone where you are living. Nobody is allowed to visit you at the refuge.
How long can I say in a refuge?
You can stay a maximum of six months in the refuge. (Pregnant women and young mothers can stay a maximum of nine months.)
How long you stay depends on your personal situation. Have the problems been resolved to such an extent that you can go back home again? Can you live on your own again? Have you found somewhere else to live? During the stay, you can prepare for your future together with a support worker.